THE AUSTRALIAN DRAMA

So, I have been in Australia a long time. It was five years in April.

I have been married to an Australian a long time. It was five years in June.

I have been going through the resident/citizenship paperwork process for a long time. It was five years in July.

Of course, the day we submitted our paperwork the first time (after thousands of certified photocopies and endless time spent sorting and filing our "evidence") they raised the fee. Fine.

We had to have an interview. Nothing like what we had been expecting (anticipating scenarios from the movie "Green Card"), she just wanted to know "how we knew". Honestly, it was just weird. "How did you KNOW?" and the meeting was over. Stamped, except...

Delayed because I needed xrays but was pregnant. Fine.

Went in for the demanded xrays and medical exam when Justice was just days old. Thus my medical exam (specifically breast exam) was worrisome - so they demanded more (at our expense) medical tests... Fine.

Mammogram. While breast feeding. Fine.

Finally, all clear and temporary permanent resident visa came through. Excellent. Except a few months later we visited the States. So, since I stepped foot in my home country after filing my paperwork, I had to get ANOTHER FBI background check. Fine.

Two years later, I had to compile a record of photos, bills, witness statements, supporting testimony and on and on and on that OVERFILLED a huge mailer in order to progress to the next stage. Another FBI check. Australian Federal Police check. Where for some reason they did the check on me in the UK (huh?!) But, all's well - granted permanent residence.

And then, eligible - finally - for my citizenship since October 2007.

Except of course my being eligible that year meant that was the year they introduced a citizenship test. More hoops. No worries. Except then there was a backlog for the test. So I waited. Finally took the test (six months after I was eligible) AND got a perfect score. (Okay, I sound proud - but truly, that sucker was PATHETICALLY easy!!!)

Then, VERY excited, I did my citizenship paperwork (warned by staff there was a four week waiting period) in MAY.

They charged my credit card the processing fee in JULY.

To date, I have NEVER received a letter or ANY correspondance regarding my citizenship. And if it doesn't come through in the next two weeks, once again I will have to pay FULL university fees with NO DISCOUNT all UPFRONT. Now, if I were a citizen, I could attend for lower fees, pay upfront for a considerable discount, or wave the fees until I am quite gainfully employed... So, THIS IS DRIVING ME NUTS!!!

I was so excited. I wanted the ceremony, a decorated shopfront, a giant cake for all our customers, a party with my friends and in-laws - a big hoopla... But the excitement is gone. Its all wearing very thin and I just want my piece of paper!

So seriously, if anyone can pull any strings, I 'm on a schedule here...